Slot Machine Jokes & Slots Stories

A lot has been said about slots, a lot of which has mocked its players as much as the game. Our slots jokes mock both. At CasinoClown.info, we see the humor in all things. Our slots stories and slots humor centers on both the game and the people who play it. After all, poking fun at yourself is often the best source of humor. Enjoy!

Slots Joke #1: Blondes Have More Luck
A blonde is in Vegas vacationing with her friends. She stands in front of a candy machine and puts two coins in. She turns the knob and a candy bar falls out. She picks up the candy bar, puts it in her pocket, and proceeds to put two more coins in the slot. She turns the knob again and another candy bar falls out.

She does this again and again and again.

A man stranding 3 steps away looks on. After her sixth candy bar, he interrupts; “Excuse me Miss? What are you doing?"

Her response?

"Duh! I'm winning here!"

Slots Joke #2: When one door opens, another one opens….
Dan was down on his luck in Vegas. He gambled away all his money and was so broke that he had to borrow a nickel from a fellow gambler just to use the men's room.

When he entered the men’s room, the door to the stall happened to be open. He went about his business and later returned to the casino floor. He used the nickel he had borrowed to play slots. He hit the jackpot.

Dan took his slots winnings to the blackjack table and tripled his win in an hour. Ten million dollars later, Dan was wealthier than he ever thought possible.

He went on a lecture tour, where he told his incredible story and extolled the virtues of staying positive. He never forgot his benefactor and never failed, while telling his story, to say that if he ever found him, he would share his fortune with him.

After months of lectures, a man in the audience jumped up and shouted, "I'm that man. It was me who gave you the nickel."

Dan responded; "You're not the one I'm looking for. I'm looking for the guy who left the door open."